thoughts of the way things were..... of how my life traveled to this spot......
wow.....so many things, so many senses are barraged,the Empire State building that we all walk under, the heat of the streets on a hot August day, the smell of the subways!, the noise of the taxi cabs, and so many people that float through my mind daily......and in my dreams, as they did last night...
as I sit on my balcony in the gorgeous weather (wow! again!) - I miss home .....the echoes of my friends and family.....I still feel connected as if I'm an astronaut on a Very Long Tether, over Here-breathing and existing, yet still drawing my air and sustenance from Home through this Very Long Tether over that Very Big Pond.....
my dear friends back home that keep me going-
Olivia, who i skype with daily just about - she that often keeps me gratefully tethered to home-
Carole-my first boss in NYC and always my Beacon Buddha, even with all her troubles now - the economy and how to survive....
Peers and Titou- the "fearless" duo!- so poetic and magical both of them!....struggling but always finding a bit of fluff of Magic Fairy Dust to make it to the next day....(oh yes, that's Titou in Bergdorf's window there-long story for another day perhaps-but, see what I mean about the Fairy Dust?!...)
my own little sister- Baby HeHe- having traded a life in LaLa Land to live now in New York City-and doing quite well, even though she announces how "miserable" she is in her Rat Race there--- while skyping me from her boyfriend's house out in the Hamptons - a bored Golf Widow......ahhh,little sis - "you are indeed a New Yorker now!.."
always and forever.....New York City..... which save a fateful drink at a bar in a certain hotel in Gurgaon ,India on May 3rd, 2007,with a certain Swedish gentleman, is probably where I would still be-...
I guess it was Ted Kennedy who died yesterday- that really made me miss home- that really made me realize that -in the words of the song:"Life goes on without me!" ......
as I sit and drink my long KOPP KAFFE- ( thankfully this morning the coffee issue is resolved!)-on my BALKONG-Teddy- the standard bearer of the Health Care Debate back home- God bless him....Godspeed to his causes that in his death may help all Americans.....
so much happening back home and here I sit...but,.....if I listen closely I can almost here the beat, beat beat of the City and the Country that I left.....
not that I may not go Home again- draw up the Very Long Tether and land again on that side of the Very Big Pond-(lest anyone panic,now!)- but Here and Now is my reality..here in my little Swedish Bubble, where i sit and try ot mastermind the Second Half of My Days.....
I have a recently made a very dear friend from the U.S., that is living over here. She is returning on a jet plane back to the Hem Land tomorrow to begin again over there...returning with her Swedish husband, and two children that she had over here.....All my good wishes and hopes go with her as she returns....She is understandably full of trepidation about returning back to a land where the Health Care issues and the Obama bashing seems to be the word on everyone's lips......I know she'll be fine....but she, like I would be, is nervous about leaving our little Swedish Bubble over here....- back to the land where things go Bang! Bang! so fast and furious back home and yet go sooooovery slooowwwly over here.....i can understand her anxiety....She'll be fine- and do fabulously ,in fact....returning to the "Land of Opportunity" .......Her little boy has announced that he "only wants to speak Swedish " when he lands in the US to make his life.....(Good luck ,Little Guy!)......asides from dramas like that- I know she'll be JUST FINE!!....
still....
to my dear friend-bring just a bit of my Heart back there with you, to keep an eye on things,will ya? and in turn..... I' ll watch this little Swedish Bubble for ya over here, OK?...
Lesson for the Soul Today-those things, people and places that created me and made me what I am now,are part of the Sum Total of Little Old Me that sits here today....may they continue to bring me solace and comfort and laughs and joy and just that touch of longing inside for the rest of my days.....
Swedish Word of the Day- that's really simple: HEM LAND- the Home Land - a place that we all have , not only geographically, but in our hearts and in our blood, and is that funny mix of all the things that make us "tick"....
meanwhile.....Would ya check the Air Pressure gauge on that Very Long Tether for me? and while your at it - shoot me over a big old huge New York bagel with lox and cream cheese,capers and onions on it- I sure would like one right about now...
TACK !....TACK SÅ MYCKET!
2 comments:
I'm with you for the craving of familiarity, Karen. It's great experiencing the new, but no so easy to dissmiss the old. Some days I would give anything just to walk through my home town, and know exactly where everything is and exactly what to do. Without it being an effort. I wonder, have you ben home since you first arrived ?
i actually go home( since it is "just across the Pond" a couple times a year. That helps, as does skyping a bit to familiar HEM LAND PERSONNER och PLATZER spots! BUt- like you this is my here and now and maybe!? who knows!?
and yeah,-I feel practically ground to a halt around here most of the time. Where is it? How do I get there?
In NYC , I could walk places WITH my eyes CLOSED and NOT get mugged even!
Hang in there!LOL!
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